The guv'nor supports monkeyshyne!

After seeing Colin's post, I decided to go to ask.com and see what I would come up with for monkeyshyne...and lo and behold, there we were, indirectly listed on Gov. Rick "My Hair Wouldn't Budge in a Hurricane" Perry's website! I'm not a Senor Perry fan, but I'll lighten up on him a tiny bit, seeing as he seems to have good taste in music...

http://www.governor.state.tx.us/divisions/music/musicians/talent/talentm2.htm

http://www.governor.state.tx.us/divisions/music/directory/radio/localshows.htm (we're listed way down on the page under the Texas Buzz listing for 94.5FM/KTBZ out of Houston).

We didn't even know Slick Rick loved us.

But it's a cool site, apparently it is run by the Texas Music Office (hell, I didn't even know there was such a thing) that was created by congressional mandate in order to promote and network music industry peoples, wow. Check it out to see some of the local radio stations/shows/resources in your neck of the woods, who knows, you may just discover something new and cool.

University of Monkeyshyne

So...there I was in my "Musicians and Pimpitude: An Exploration of Your Mojo" class today, when I noticed someone sitting next to me I had never seen before....hey! it's Colin! That's right, my drummer and buddy is in the same class as me, working to further improve the already near-deadly effectiveness of his Mojo with the ladies.

But then, disaster struck...we had an unannounced pop quiz....and this very interesting verbal exchange followed. Please note that any similarities between cartoon characters and real people are coincidental, and no pickles or Chili Cheese Fritos were harmed during the filming of this feature...

The Midnight Ride of RunRun Revere...

...ok, so well it's usually way after midnight when we leave gigs, and RunRun's last name isn't Revere, but seeing as I'm taking a history class right now, it seemed to fit.

As many of you know, RunRun is our trusty road steed. Sure, she may have a slightly ghetto half black/half white paint job complete with runs (done in Chris' driveway, no less), funky red velour captain's chairs, no radio, questionable brakes (ohmygodwe'regoingtodieeeeeeee!!!!), carpet that has had countless frenchfries ground into it (among other things, use your imagination), no cruise control, and until recently A/C that was about as effective as a fly farting on you (ironic, as we just fixed it and now don't need it so much). Oh yes, and let's not forget that anytime we park somewhere, there's invariably a puddle of some mystery engine-related liquid that magically appears beneath her.

But RunRun is our girl...she's never left us stranded...almost once, but Chris fixed the brakes by the side of the road with a drumstick and a hacksaw blade (really).

So the other night, when we were leaving Dallas, RunRun wouldn't go into drive all the way...I got her out of Chris' driveway, but then we got stuck at the alley/street intersection. Colin had to push us backwards for a minute, then we got it to go. Hmm, we say, but she drove fine on the way there.

After our S Lounge gig, she was being cranky. Maybe because it was balls cold outside in Wichita Falls at 2:30am the other night, but she wouldn't stay in drive...or go into it, in the first place. Chris drove all the way home constantly shifting through the gears, trying to get her to engage in "drive". We limped home late in the chilly morning, whereupon RunRun gave a loud sigh and promptly pooped a puddle of transmission fluid on Chris' driveway.

So everyone tonight, light a little candle and send warm, fuzzy thoughts to RunRun....I think she needs some love!

p.s. RunRun told me she would like it if you visited her MySpace!

Guess what I found?

Today, as I was cleaning out our storage room in our practice space (which is an utter lie, but I have to start the story somehow) I ran across all of our old pictures from when we were all kids...that's right, we all grew up together, you know (really, we did)....went to the same elementary school, rode the same short yellow bus, stole other kids' lunch money in the cafeteria, and we were one helluva dodgeball team...we ruled the playground.

The first picture I found was Oz's. Wow look at him...he's pimp and one sexy motherf$%^$# even way back then...look at the pimp silk tie...the shades...the look. The little girls all swooned every time he walked by, and giggled and offered to share their pudding cups with him at lunch, although I'm not quite sure if any us really knew if it was their "pudding cups" they were offering....hey, we were 6.

Next, I reached in and found one of Colin. He was sporting the rocker-hairdo even back then, and representin' THE superhero, you know, Batman. He had his drummer gloves ready to go, and even though his mom wouldn't give him a drumset quite yet, he would beat on anything with his set of drumsticks (they were actually Tinkertoy sticks then, but hey it was a start), to include coffee cans, pickle jars, and the family cat. He also taught us to talk cool, and taught us words like "holla", "peace out", and "hey baby wanna see the inside of our van?" even though I think Run-Run (our van) was just a twinkle in Ford's eye at the time.

Next I found one of, hey that's me! Man, was I drinking coffee and smoking even when I was 6? Apparently so. Although Mom wouldn't allow me to wear my favorite "heathen" Metallica t-shirt, I would hide it over at my buddy Chris' house and wore it every day. I think I look mad in this pic because Colin kept calling me "Robin the Gay Boy Wonder" and would try to kick my ass...hence him having a black eye in his picture, haha.

Last, but definitely not least, was a pic of our buddy Chris. He looks like he was born ready to rock! That is a $29 Sears guitar he got for his 6th birthday...I think he even slept with it, and took it to the bathroom with him...ewww. Anyway, he was sporting his favorite AC/DC shirt too, which he got away with wearing in his house by telling his parents it stood for "All Cats Devour Cookies", very slick, huh? Yes, Baldilocks had hair once upon a time! I personally think he doesn't miss it one bit, all the chicks seem to like rubbing his dome and purring "mmmm" to him these days.

To Harley, or not to Harley....

....that is the question.

Chris had to take his Harley into the shop the other day, so I followed him up there so he could drop it off. While I was waiting on him to do his thing, I was wandering around the lot, they were having some sort of sale. There were some badass mofo-ing bikes up there, and once again I caught myself wanting one. Or just a bike in general.

Then I flash back about 13 years, to when I did used to ride...I've had 2 bikes in the past...first one was a Honda V45 Magna, which I learned to ride on. Back in the day, this was a badass bike with a lot of power, so it was kind of learning to drive, but in a Corvette. Scared the S#$% out of me sometimes. Then I traded that in on a Yamaha FZR750...at the time, was one of the baddest sport bikes around. I rode that thing all over until one special day, when a dimwitted piece of poo driving a red Chevy Cavalier (I'll never forget it) changed lanes into me, and I had nowhere to immediately go in that split second. I tried to hit the brakes enough for her to not plow into me without locking the brakes full up (bad on a bike when you're doing about 65) but no luck. Next thing I knew I was in the hospital with a major concussion, a busted wrist, and bruises all over. The guy in a truck a bit behind me saw the whole thing, and said that after a part of my bike ricocheted off the ground during the skid, it flipped, launching me Superman-style over the side, down the highway, where apparently I slid for about 100-150ft. I was lucky I got off relatively easy, and that I was wearing a helmet, or I woulda suffered more damage to my noggin' than I probably already have done myself, haha.

So anyway, I always get in these damn internal debates about motorcycles. I want one, because I miss riding...but then I think about the idiots on the road who hit motorcyclists all the time, not to mention I get nervous when I get in traffic due to aforementioned accident, not to really mention the fact that Dallas drivers are insane. I figured I made it this far, through a few combat zones, I don't want to be done in by someone fiddling with their radio or putting on their eyeliner while driving, and then mow me down because they're not paying attention.

On that note, keep an eye out for motorcyclists when you're driving...take that extra sec to look over your shoulder to make sure that Chris isn't cruising along in Hog-heaven right next to you!

ok, that's it...I must vent!

As you all may know, us monkeyboys (with one Oz notable exception Oz who will Oz remain nameless Oz) are all on myspace....I originally got on there because of the band, and I now also keep in touch with new friends, old friends from all over, and people I used to be in the Air Force with. It's also a great tool for keeping up with shows from other bands....you can see where band X is playing at on Y date, so on and so forth.

But there's one BAD thing about myspace (well, besides that damn "Sorry! We have encountered a technical error! This message has been forwarded to our lazy ass technical department!" message). Bulletins. EVIL bulletins. Ok, well they're not all evil, some are downright funny as hell...but I'm getting tired of seeing these sappy lovey-dovey bulletins float around.

Oops...where did that come from? Anyway, the latest sappy one listed 50 things a guy should do for a girl. I've seen this bulletin posted literally 20 times before, all by women (SURPRISE! haha) but one of them made me almost barf a little in the back of my throat :)

"Give her the world". Oh come on now, that's a bit much, don't you think?? And then I thought, hey this would be a funny situation....



Dude (D): Umm hey I got you something.
Chick (C): Really? Is it sparkly and shiny???
D: Well, I guess certain parts of it could be, if the electricity is on.
C: Really? Is it diamond earrings? An engagement ring?
D: Uh no. It's even better!
C: (squealing and jumping up and down) really honey? is it tickets to Paris? My own pony??
D: No...I'm giving you the world!!!
C: What?
D: (whips out Earth from behind his back and thumps it down on Chick's shoulders, nearly crushing her to death, and her pet Yorkie Sadie-poo as well) there you go baby, I gave you the world!
C: Ooof! (topples over and is crushed to death by Sri Lanka)

So ladies...be careful what you wish for!

I have returned

So, after a brief internal power struggle which pitted Baldilocks against the Boys, the blogs for the rest of us are back. This is a momentous occasion, of course, on par with the Battle of the Bulge, the American Revolution, and the Invention of Chili Cheese Fritos (whch I would like to point out, I did indeed eat on the way to Wichita Falls this past weekend). To comemmorate our Blog Victory, I would like to post a photo that was taken as we waded ashore after leaping off our Mark-VII Assault MLC (MonkeyLandingCraft) yesterday after defeating the Axis of Evi...I mean Chris....

...so in the end, us non-Chris-types won the battle....and apparently I need to lay off the Chili Cheese Fritos too.