Operation Monkeyshyne

For some reason today, I was thinking about all the crap going on in Iraq on the way home from skool today, and how glad I was that my ass (apparently a nice one, according to Colin) is not over there again. But due Oz's blog earlier where Chris was referenced as "Colonel Asshole" or something like that, I started imagining what it would be like if we, monkeyshyne, went into combat together.

(bouncing around on the way to the front in a armored Humvee)

Chris: Man, it's frigging hot. Good thing we have cruise control on our Hummer, Colin, instead of the A/C we coulda fixed...we can roll easily at 60mph in sweaty style.
Colin: Screw you, buddy. You're not the one making the long drives at 6am back to base, you're drooling in one of the back seats fast asleep.
Keith: Oh good God, shut the hell up. Has anyone seen me Mk-VII Combat Spork? I can't find it.
Oz: Hey Colin, can you try to not hit so many rocks and holes in the desert? I'm trying to do my toenails in the latest color, Chameleon Camo...it's all the rage in Paris, I hear.
Chris: I think we redesign these uniforms to look like camouflaged Boy Scout Uniforms...that would so rock!
Colin: You know how I know you're gay?
Oz: I am not gay!
Keith: He wasn't talking to you, Oz.
Oz: Oh sorry...hey, here's your spork sticking out of Colin's assault pack.
Keith: What the hell, buddy? Trying to steal my trusty Attack Spork?
Colin: Well, I lost mine...my lighter and spork were about to fall out the window, and it was lighter or spork, but not both...I went for the lighter.

(BOOM!)

Oz: Hey, we're under attack? How's my hair??? I gotta look good in combat, you know!
Chris: It looks super, buddy....RETURN FIRE!!!"

(the monkeyshyne boys leap out of the Hummer and lay down withering return fire against the insurgents led by Abu-dali Achbar-Poopnugistan).

Chris: Got another one! Hey I'm outta ammo...Colin, you got anymore?
Colin: As soon as I'm done with my smoke, buddy. Anyone seen my Mountain Dew?
Keith: I think it took a RPG round, buddy....I think...it's.....gone.
Colin: NOOOOOOOOooooooooo!
Oz: Hey guys, I think I broke a nail..anyone have a nail file?

(the boys successfully repel the insurgent attack, and and hop back in their truck and go on their merry way)

hmmm...maybe we should just stick to playing music, haha.